Stories of the Spiritual Retreat in Peru: The Seen & Unseen became seen to my right eye!

It was March 2022, I was in Peru, not looking for Paddington Bears aunt & uncle, I was on a spiritual retreat, part of a group of 19, there would have been more, and they couldn’t leave their country as their government was running scared of a virus!

One day, A beautiful group of five joined us to guide us, sing to us and with us, play their drums, guitars, and that colourfully decorated clay pot with two holes that you force air in and out of with your palm! And to share the San Pedro :[ ‘San Pedro cactus (Trichocereus pachanoi), otherwise known as the Cactus of the Four Winds, Huachuma or Saint Peter’s Cactus, is a fast-growing columnar cactus native to the Andes Mountains – which can grow up to 20 feet high. It is usually found in Peru, Argentina, Bolivia, Chile, and Ecuador’ ] medicine with us.

The ceremony was beautiful and felt very sacred, we all sat in a circle in the circular hut, with its shiny wooden floor and massive array of windows that exposed to us the gorgeous and awe-inspiring views of the mountains around us; the juice was offered to each of us in turn, it went clockwise around the room and we each let the offerer know if we wanted a partial or full cup. Most were courageous and went the full cup.

I went full cup too and waited for the 30-60 minutes for it to kick-in’. 

We were told it is heart-opening and you might get emotions rising strongly in your system and that it works in waves, you’ll feel fine then a wave will hit and you’ll feel something and the medicine stays in the system for a full day.

We started our ceremony in the morning and the medicine would be working with us until the following day….

With great anticipation I asked for a full cup and drank the thick liquid down in 4-5 gulps, I was worried it would be like Ayahausca and not taste too great and it was in fact totally fine, tasted like a little like a green juice, in some ways.

We had sick buckets shared around the room and were told we would probably be sick. When I did Aya I was not sick and actually asked the planet medicine to work through my whole system and it worked then, so I asked the same for San Pedro.

I sat for maybe 45 minutes and then felt my stomach cramp and I just breathed through it and it calmed down, I then felt a wave of emotion, it was like many people had died and my grief was massive. I had this on a Vipassana retreat where I shifted stuck energy from my body, so I knew the painful emotions once moved would make way for peace, so I surrendered and went with the wave of strong emotion.

I had to lay on my front to let the surrender go fully, I laid there in that position for ‘I’ve no idea how long’, a while, and wave after wave of emotion ran through my whole body, I shook like you do when you cry really hard over a loss. I wept and wept and sobbed and shook for a while, the waves crashed through me and I felt the last move through and I was spent. I relaxed and think slept a while.

When I felt ok again, I sat up and just listened to what was going on with the mystical-5, playing music, and just waited for the next round…..

The next wave took maybe an hour to come along and I felt my vision wobble, even though the introduction said it's not often a visual experience. My eyes went soft-focused like when you are truly drunk on alcohol ( I gave that up 4 years ago, along with meat ).

I found my right eye was less focused and the left okay, the feeling dis-orientated me so I laid back on my mat and blanket and round pillow and chilled out. I started to notice that the wooden ceiling above me moved!, I tried to focus and found it became a sea of movement.

As I watched it swirling around in gentle flows, all rather random, ‘brownie-in-motion’ came to mind from my science class from decades ago.

I concentrated a bit more and started to see that within the wooden underside of the roof, I could make out levels of density and I counted ‘eventually’ nine layers.

Within the layers, I made out shapes and I thought beings, though none clear enough to be sure, and I ‘felt’ for the intent and they were all just going about their days, oblivious to me seeing them…!

I thought if that’s in the wooden roof, what does the rest of the room and outside the mountain range contain.

So cautiously I got up and I went outside, walking like a drunkard, each stepping feeling alien to my body, though I could actually feel bodies, like the Russian doll idea, all within the being that’s me!

I got outside and held the railing for some support 🙂 and looked at the massive mountain range in front of me, in the sacred valley of Peru.

It’s an awesome sight, the mountain at home in England, by Dartmoor, are mere molehills compared to these magnificent ranges, even when you can see just one layer, and to see nine layers of ‘reality’ at once within the mountains and the blue sky above was awe-inspiring.

Words truly cannot describe the visual I saw in front of me!

I could see the Apus Gods, smiling back at me from the mountains, a massive Cobra sat in the mountain in front of me, shimmering side to side, flanked by two small cobras like the caduceus. 

I saw numerous, maybe twenty-plus Apus, Mountain Gods and Goddesses. 

And the backbone of the mountains, with its already Dragon scale looking back, moved slightly and the Dragonhead to the far right moved a fraction to look at me watching it and it acknowledged me with its eyes and mind and went back to its slumberous sleep.

I dared to look up above the mountains, so alive and beautiful, and saw literally thousands of magnificent flying beasts, the skies were filled with level after level of Dragon, small to mighty, dark and deep skinned to multiple coloured, like the shimmer of oil on water. I went from awe-struck to awestruck and reeled at what I was witnessing.

I had to close my right eye to stop my brain from exploding at the sights!

I wobbly returned to my mat in the round glass fringed hut and laid on the blanket and comfy round pillow and closed my eyes to escape the overpowering wonderment that I could see.

I laid there for a while until the musical-5 packed up, ready to move down into the garden and the afternoon around the fire pit…

I stood up again, wobbly as a Drunk on a total bender…. and headed for the lower garden and fire pit.

I managed to work my way down the stone steps and the grass slope, noting all the others reclining in the sunshine, on the grass. All looked fully spaced out and relaxed, each with an enigmatic smile that would put the Mona Lisa’s to shame.

The lower garden had a couple of open tents set up, with mats and cushions, so I headed for one of those, to shade from the strong sunshine, it the mountains you are so high, nearly 3000 metres, so very close to the suns rays, which means you burn fast.

I laid my side on one of the mats and rested my heavy head on my hand and with crossed eyes, watched and listened to the musicians. I went in and out of concentration on them and watched as people migrated down to us, I gained concentration now and then and found a different person had joined me under the tent and the area around the fire pit in front of me filled up slowly as we all joined the music garden.

I felt relaxed, my stomach had stopped giving me any signs of wanting to reject the plant medicine and I felt good.

The music at some points caught my full attention and I stood up to sway to the music, holding onto the solid iron tent pole for support!

At a point in the proceedings I felt the need to hug a beautiful tree and stood for a while watching the ants climb up and down its trunk, they climbed over my hand and continued as if I was part of the tree and that tree felt so strong and grounded to me.

I then felt the need to go and say hello to a variety of colourful and so delicate and divinely beautiful flowers and then back to my resting mat for a bit more of a chill-out.

The wave of concentration came back and I felt strong enough to walk without too much effort, so I went and sat in the fire pit, it had a comfy grass bank circle around the fire pit, that with a repositioned mat and long round pillow, which I put behind my spine, made for a very comfortable position next to the musicians.

I spent much of the afternoon there, shading my head from the sun with my headscarf and listening to the musicians and singers, it was a blissful afternoon, I felt relaxed and happy.

A few of our group picked up guitars and drums and sang too when the musicians had a restful moment, our group sang well and we encouraged them when they lost words in their own state of unfocused-ness.

Later in the afternoon some delicious and well-needed fruit and drinks were laid out on a table and a few of us tucked into the so delicious and juicy fruits. Something about the taste was enhanced by the sacred medicine and the deliciousness caused waves of Joy which sparked child-like laughter and a few of us lost control and were in fits of laughter that only we seemed to understand. The memory of that joyous moment makes me smirk with a big smile now :)

After regaining some laughter control I returned to my comfy seat to find that the gorgeous Yoga teacher had borrowed my spot, I was happy for her to sit in it a while :) and I sat closer to the singers and listened intently to the repetitive cords and words, and I find myself now often drifting off hearing those words… ‘Ja Ja Ma……’, I heard them well into the early hours when in bed, even though they had stopped being played hours before….

At some later point, the group started to gather away from the fire pit and on the grass for a ceremony, we each took a number of leaves and put them into a fan shape and each one by one planted them along with a strawberry and seeds, into the ground and offered our thanks to Mother Earth and the Apus, Mountains, offering thanks for the abundant that Mother Earths feeds us with…. It was a very special ceremony and I feel still the deep love and respect for the land that exudes from the people of Peru.

We returned to the fire pit, careful not to sit on the ants all running about busy doing what ants do!

The fire was lit and I offered my multi-coloured offering from my temple to the Fire and to the Apus and to Peru, fo having me safe and  soundly here. I watched the fire dance and saw within the flames many spirits dancing to the musicians and singers. The flames of a fire always have my attention and you can see so much in them, far better than any TV show, in San Pedro’s waves the fire take on an even more angelic dance and I saw much in the fire, to keep me entertained well after sunset and moon up.

I stayed by the fire, as did much go the group cuddling to keep warm and often to offer support as they wept through a process until the flames were low and the rain arrived, this had us all decamp the fire pit and protect the instruments from the rains drops.

We wandered back up the stone steps to the large round wooden hut with its views of the mountains and the music carried on late into the darkness, people left as the night moved on, some started grouping and healing each other, others went on mystical quests to Egypt, I did some comforting of a lady giving birth to a mystical Dragon and then at a point I felt the need for sleep and returned to my lodgings in the Earth Chakra lodge, I attempted to sleep and my mind kept playing the songs over and over keeping me to alert to sleep. At some point, I did sleep, a very dreamful sleep and awoke at first light feeling that I was still in the grips of the medicine, that feeling lasted well into breakfast and beyond.

I felt fully in control again in the afternoon and truly loved my little trip with San Pedro and would wholeheartedly be happy to go again when the opportunity offers itself.